Holiday Laughs From R.J. Johnston

 Holiday Laughs

R.J. Johnson

-Santa and his elves are busy at the North Pole making sure everyone gets at least one gift for Christmas. Or as politicians on the extreme right call that, “More people looking for free stuff.”

– It’s chilly out there! It’s so cold, Hillary Clinton said her brain froze and she can’t testify about what happened in Libya.

– It was so cold, Tim Tebow slept with his girlfriend just for the body heat.

– A woman in Sweden has been been convicted of having sex with a skeleton. Her biggest complaint. Not a lot of pillow talk.

– Times are tough out here during the holidays. It’s so bad, the Octomom had to use her own eggs to make Egg Nog.

– I watched the latest episode of Gold Rush. Not the TV series. Hugh Hefner’s fiancé planning her wedding day.

And Finally…

– You know how people stopped the Mayans from ending the world, don’t you? They called Aztec support.