– It\u2019s so hot, Mitt Romney said the sun burned up his old tax returns.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – The Obama slogan about looking at the future is, \u201cYes We Can.\u201d Not to be confused with the Romney slogan about looking at his tax returns, \u201cNo You Can\u2019t.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – The Mars rover is called Curiosity and it\u2019s sending photos you can see on your computer. Not to be confused with<\/strong><\/p>\n a computer page called Bi-Curiosity. That\u2019s a web site with photos about a whole different thing.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – Gold medalist Ryan Lochte is handsome. His mom said he likes one-night-stands. And he told reporters that he pees in the swimming pool. Olympics? Sounds more like \u201cThe Jersey Shore\u201d to me.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – A nudist camp in Florida is holding a weekend bash to attract a younger crowd, like 18-30. Doesn\u2019t Florida already have a big party every year to attract young nudists? It\u2019s called Spring Break, right?<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – I got an e-mail today from Joe Biden. The bad news?<\/strong><\/p>\n It was a chain letter.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – The economy is so tough on health care, Joe Biden volunteered to be an appendix donor.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – According to the Associated Press, people in South Korea are eating dogs because they say it gives them the stamina to beat the heat. One side effect? They start panting and drooling when they\u2019re out in the sun too long.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – This is so bad. U.S. judo competitor Nick Delpopolo was expelled from the Olympics after eating a brownie with marijuana. But he said he\u2019ll be back in four years.<\/strong><\/p>\n His new event? Thai-Stick Kwon Do.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – U.S. judo competitor Nick Delpopolo was expelled from the Olympic after eating a brownie containing marijuana. The really strange part? His first match was with Willie Nelson.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – A hearse driver in L.A. died while taking a body to a funeral home. The cause of death? Clogged ironies.<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – You know Joe Biden\u2019s least favorite song, don\u2019t you?<\/strong><\/p>\n \u201cChain of Fools.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n – Bill Gates is sponsoring a competition to reinvent the toilet. Didn\u2019t he already do that? Wasn\u2019t it called Windows 95?<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" R.J. Johnson – It\u2019s so hot, Mitt Romney said the sun burned up his old tax returns. \u00a0 – The Obama slogan about looking at the future is, \u201cYes We Can.\u201d Not to be confused with the Romney slogan about … Continue reading